Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Someone's Been Keeping Secrets... do I want to surprise everyone...?

Well, for starters, guess what? I've been dating someone for over a year now and you probably fall into one of these categories A) You had no idea B) You knew I was dating someone but have no idea who or C) You know everything because I tell you everything. Group C, shocker #2 will probably not be news to you either, but read on for your own entertainment.

So now that we cleared that up, perhaps you are wondering if it's serious. Yeah. I'd say it just got really serious. Marriage serious? Hahaha!! You should know me better than that. I don't commit that easily and I certainly don't do things the way you're supposed to. You know...first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes baby in the baby carriage. That silly little song we were taught at a very young age to lay the groundwork as early as possible for a normal standard our parents wanted us to live by. The thing is, my parents both checked out early, so I rewrote that little number, and now it goes like this. First comes BABY...then maybe we'll move on to love at some point when there's more time for that sort of thing and who really knows about marriage? I can't see the future.

Yeah, I said baby. I am almost certain you are reading this thinking that it couldn't have happened to a better person and I'll make an excellent mother. I am also pretty sure you saw the sarcasm in that and are really reaching for your phone to call up your friend who's been looking to adopt to let them know what's about to come on the market. Put the phone down. We're keeping it. Yes, I know that scares you and that's perfectly understandable. It scares me too. My dog is seven years old and I have yet to properly potty train her and I fully expect my laundry to fold itself. I put off mundane things like getting my hair trimmed and my oil changed because I hate taking the time out of my day to bother with it. I love sleep more than anything in life and my favorite thing to daydream about is packing up everything I own on a whim and moving someplace completely new.

I am SO prepared for this.