Wednesday, July 28, 2010

The Details

I realize it's not very nice of me to drop a couple of bombs like that and then just check out without explaining everything. I'm sure it's the sort of thing those of you who know me are used to by now though. I'm very mysterious. It's part of my charm.

So to answer the obvious questions, "daddy" is my boyfriend, Peyton. We both work at the same company, on the same floor and have told almost no one that we are even dating. That should make telling them we're having a baby even more delightful. Looking back, I feel like if we had been a little more open about our relationship, the news of being pregnant wouldn't end up being such a shock. And we all know shocking news makes GREAT gossip. At the same time, I think if people had known all along that we have been together, I probably would have spent the past year being asked for status updates on my personal life by people who have no place whatsoever in my personal life. It would not have been pretty, I can be a little feisty at times.

More about him: He has been more supportive and helpful and patient than I ever could have expected, and not a day has gone by in the past few weeks that I have not thanked God that if this had to happen, it happened with him and not with one of the mistakes I've made in the past. He will be an amazing father, and if things keep going my way, he'll be amazing at doing all of my laundry for me as well. I've just been that lucky so far...

About the baby: HE (because I have a feeling about these things) is about 11 weeks and counting. There are fingers and fingernails, eyelids, intestines, legs, a pretty large head (for the equally large brain, obviously) and basically all of the necessities that he has been required to grow at this point. He has also recently developed the ability to pee and do somersaults. Maybe even at the same time. Isn't that special?

So are we excited? Well...I think I can now say that yes, we have gotten to that point. It wasn't immediate, although the decision to keep and raise this baby was hardly ever in question. We just had to realize that what we are about to do has been done many, many times before this by people with much less than we have, and to have a little faith in ourselves. My father walked out of my life after 21 years of raising me without my mother, and I turned out to be a decent human being. I know that I can at the VERY least promise to never do such a cowardly thing, so right off the bat, this baby has every opportunity to be even better than decent.

Everything is "so far so good". I am apparently the healthiest I've ever been, so the timing is strangely perfect. I could not have said that even as recently as a few months ago. But as of right now, the baby has a pretty nice place to call home.