Thursday, September 22, 2011

STOP THE PRESSES!!!!

This just in...on the front page of Yahoo! (as opposed to the back one), the headline is this: "Beyonce talks pregnancy changes."  In the article, she makes stunning revelations about having a heightened sense of smell, and going so far as to say that some smells even make her stomach turn.  What??? No really, read for yourself...

Beyonce descended from the palace made of clouds in heaven that we imagine she lives in to make an appearance Wednesday night at the New York launch party for her third scent (called "Pulse").  Bey was happy to discuss her pregnancy with reporters, and revealed she's experiencing cravings and a heightened sense of smell, just like non-Beyonce pregnant women have been since the beginning of time. "My nose, I smell everything from a mile away," she told the Associated Press. "Usually it is food, it is onions or something that I just can't tolerate."


I didn't make it past that first paragraph because a) I don't care, b) "Bey" does not live in a cloud palace in the heavens, or no one would be trying to go there when they die, and c) I was happy to simply take from this the irony that she is griping about smells at a launch party for her third perfume.  


In other news, Harrison has the runs.  Big time.  Maybe twenty dirty diapers in the past four days, but who's counting?  Daycare for one.  They actually called us yesterday to tell us Harrison seems fine but that he's "not feeling well."  Well, which one is it?  Oh wait, I get it.  "Not feeling well" is code for "please come get your kid and take him home because you do not pay us enough to deal with this amount of poop."  Ok, fine.  I took him home and let him play naked on the floor to air out the diaper rash and we had a good time.  


He also has a new tooth and finds it quite fascinating. He likes to twist his tongue upside down so he can feel what he's been working so hard for all these months.  Hopefully the next ones will happen a bit more quickly.  


Harrison is officially mobile now as well.  Not quite crawling, but pulling with his arms and pushing with his feet so that he gets where he wants to go (the electronics under the TV) pretty quickly, and then uses objects he shouldn't be touching to try to pull himself up.  HIs new favorite toys are things that are not toys and are not his.  The rubber spatula is a new favorite.  Remote controls are good, Daddy's knick-knacks that he is unwisely storing on a low-lying shelf.  The toy budget just got a whole lot smaller now that I can just grab something without sharp edges or small parts and hand it to him.  His eyes light up like it's Christmas and he even takes a moment to turn the object over in his hands a few times to relish its beauty and craftsmanship before putting it in his mouth.  


Ok, now honestly...of the two stories above, which one was more news-worthy and fascinating?  


The one about this:


Or the one about THIS:



THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT!!

No comments:

Post a Comment