Chupacabra vs. Pants

Remember back when I was saying how great maternity clothes are? Well, I was referring to the jeans. Because so far, I have managed to find one...that's right, ONE PAIR...of maternity pants. They are black. Of course. Because why would anyone make maternity pants in another color? Well, I am not buying two pairs of pants that look exactly alike to wear for 5 months of my life. I'm annoyed every time I have to spend money on this stuff anyway, because there are much more important things at which I could be throwing my truckloads of cash. Stuff for the baby? Medical bills? Babyker's savings account which only seems to decrease? Pizza? Really, just about anything. Hunting for a stupid pair of unblack pants is starting to get on my nerves.

So if anyone happens to see these elusive creatures while out and about (and it's not likely) go ahead and snap a picture and send it to National Geographic. After that, come tell me the store name and its exact coordinates, and provide a hand-drawn map guiding me to the very rack on which you spotted these rarities. Just a warning, you will probably encounter Bigfoot at least twice along your journey and I'm guessing a whole pack of "mythical" chupacabras as well. Which aren't mythical at all, you know. I have one. Her name is Zoe. And she was a lot easier to get my hands on too.